Monday, August 18, 2008


Last Weekend a couple of my very close friends and I embarked on a journey akin to Frodo and Sam's journey into Mordor accept with much less homosexual innuendos. The reason for this epic journey was not to destroy evil or for fame and fortune but was for a much happier purpose....the wedding of a close friend of ours...which for him is probably like becoming a slave to sauron but thats the case with most marriages and is another story entirely.

I was joined on this journey by a few familiar names to the blogosphere. The all commenting legend of secunda Infinium, the lovely zesty zaheera and her hubby the Master of Chi. For some of us this was the first time we were to travel to this strange land. As we set out we did not know what to expect and only had with us the tales of previous explorers which had braved the harsh conditions to return to tell of "LADYSMITH" (*SPIT*)

We heeded their warnings and advise as to how to deal with what we were about to face. We packed light for the journey we had hoped would span a mere weekend...ofcourse this is not enough to explore the vast dominion known as "lADYSMITH" (*SPIT*)(HEAVY DOSE OF SARCASM ALERT). We were warned by other travellers of its dangers and its lack of any sort of shopping mall's or semeblance of civilization. I myself feared we may be entering into the zone where normal things dont happen very often or be driving into one of those movies where a bunch of friends make a wrong turn and get hacked up by some mutant farmer and his mutant sheep.(Shudders)

The Journey to "LADYSMITH" (*SPIT*) seemed to be over in an instant as the car seemed to be propelled by the raucous laughter of its occupants. The mood was kept merry by the introduction of "Padkos" (The South Arican Version of Eleven Bread that Frodo and Sam took with them) by the ever Zesty Zaheera. It included divine spring rolls, Cheese Flavoured Purr (Samoosa's that went bad but were extremely tasty) and every flavour of Smint you can imagine (which was provided by MOCHI).

We Passed vast oceans of flat veld and gorgeous hills and valley's as we neared our destination. We reached "LADYSMITH" (*SPIT*) safe and sound but cutting it close in terms of fulfilling the purpose of the journey. We needed to reach our shelter and get ready for the wedding. For this is used the "Light of Garmin" to show us the way in the darkness. However "LADYSMITH" (*SPIT*) knew of our plans and the Garmin could not even pick up where we were. It was as if we had passed through all known barriers of time and space and indeed unded up in the Twilight Zone. We then employed the help of allies in "LADYSMITH" (*SPIT*) who helped us navigate our way to safety.

Getting to the Wedding Hall was a bit of a mission with the "Power of the Garmin" failing us again but we eventually made it. The wedding was a lovely occassion but the less said about the food the better (*SPIT*) The usual wedding activities unsued and by the end of the night we were beat as we has to rise early the next morrow to head back to civilization for the Walima.

We knew our way back however our exertions of the previous night placed us in a semi sleep state.... and the journey back lasted forever. I believe the real reason for this was that "LADYSMITH" (*SPIT*) left its mark on us. We made it for the Walima in good time however and again the usual occurred.

The weekend was at an end. We had travelled to unknown lands and back and we were now the wiser. The un married amoungst our Fellowship vowed not to get marry in "LADYSMITH". Our journey was over and we recorded new memories that will be spoken about until such time as we forget them. All in all "LADYSMITH" is a quaint little town which was not as bad as I expected. I may even Return

Now Zesty are you still going to Sue me ?

Kuwabara, Kuwabara
The Lone Writer


M Junaid said...

I attended a wedding in ladysmith once. Was . . . . Quaint. Love the lord of the rings references. classy stuff son.
Just something i want to bring up- sam and frodo and the gay references- was this evident before the mtv movie awards skit with ben stiller and more importantly clerks 2, or only after?
Fucking word verification!

Khadija said...

the towns to which travel in the name of the wedding... ladysmith can't be as bad as kimberly.

Waseem said...

I like road trips, we went once to a wedding in Newcastle. We went past Ladysmith, it was fairly non-existant. Newcastle is ok though, seems better than PMB in liveliness. Nothing better than home sweet home.

Great post.

Infinium said...

lol, bravo my good man, an excellent satirical-parody of our adventure to "Ladysmith-or". I must agree with MJ the LOTR references are extremely fitting...

Alas i have but one bone to pick with this piece, well more of a correction then anything, INFINIUM MOST CERTAINLY DOES NOT HAIL FROM THEE DREADED SECUNDA ( merely worked there for a few months), lol... Other then that KMAN my good bro, really awesome and descriptive piece

Zesty, those samoosas were gooooood, big ups to you ;) and thanks for bringing them, lol...

Let it BURN, Let it ALL BURN

MasterOfChi said...

(SPIT, SPIT, SPIT, SPIT), damn that taste is still in my mouth!
*screams for zesty to bring another bucket*

Zahera said...

LMAOOOO! Hey- i contributed more to this roadtrip than just the samoosas ya know! I refuse to be known as the, "lady who brings the food." That sounds soo... mumsy *makes a face*

If i could sue you, id sue you for making this blog entry so flipping funny :-D i was laughing the entire way through it! Truly Kman, you did justice to it. Infact, i think its so damn good that i wont be able to match such mastery. Therefore, i ask for thy permission to link instead? :-D

Infinium- did you even eat the samoosas?!?! I thought you scoffed ya gob with the spring rolls :-P

Husby- are you talking about the samoosas :-( or Lay-deh smith? :-D x

Mohamed Karolia said...

MJ: Thanks man glad you liked that piece. I think the Gay innuendos were always there and as people watched it I think it kinda resided in the back of peoples minds. The Mtv Movie award skit was really funny but thats when everyone jumped on the "Sam and Frodo are gay2 bandwagon.

Khadija: Atleast Kimberly has the big Hole...Ladysmith has ermmmmmm Ladysmith has alot of B&B's lol

Waseem: Glad you liked the post man. I know some people from Newcastle and ive been told its just like Ladysmith. Nothing can beat the BIG CITY hehe :p

Infinium: You would like Secunda to burn right? lol

Mochi: Lol you got the curse bad...though you were lucky you didnt taste the food at the wedding.

Zesty: Well I'm glad I lived up to your expectations and of course you may link going to come visit and I expect some cheese flavoured Purr lol hehe

Infinium said...

Zesty: lol, yes yes yes, while i did enjoy the spring rolls, i did partake of the samoosa's, lol...

Kman: I would not mind that one bit, lol...

MoCHI: Hope you got rid off those buckets, lol... hahaha

Let it BURN, Let it ALL BURN

Infinium said...

oh and Zesty, hence forth you will be known as the "lady who brings the food." hahaha... hey you know i take them where i get them... lol

r said...

i can't stop laughing!! Matty, you understand my mirth.. However.. If i choose for some ungodly reason to get married in LADYSMITH *spit* would you pitch for the walima??

Anonymous said...

Went past Ladysmith once.
However, I will defend small towns as I hail from one myself.
Kind of miss the fact that things get done in an hour instead of an entire day here in civilisation.

I am a lucky one, I have three homes.
One in civilisation, one in farm land and one in the country.

Awesome hehe

qk said...

LoL. This post is two months old, but I have to drop this comment since I'm from the little dorpie myself.

It's definitely quaint, tear-your-hair-outboring, and full of nutters but now that i'm out of there, i actually miss it.

Trinity said...

LoL...I agree...loved the Lord of the Rings references!!