This post is not really going to have a proper train of thought....
Every Year for the past Seven years this particular time of the year has always brought me stress, anxiety, madness, more white hair then Jay Leno and then when all hope is lost and the world is about to descend in chaos and despair relief descends like a gentle summer rain which cools the earth...... almost sounds poetic. This relief only arrives after an arduously long wait, which is not really that long but seems long to the student waiting for their results.
This year was slightly different though. My results and whether I passed or failed would have an impact on the next stage of my life. The stage where studies end and LIFE begins. Not saying that the other years of studying are not to be considered LIFE, but student life is meant to be fun and carefree. The LIFE im talking about is the one where you stand up on your own two feet and start to realize....oh crap i have responsibilities now!
So this year I finished exams earlier then usual as.... WITS my beloved University is slowly going senile... and proceeded to wait for my results. Now I don't know about you guys but with me I never tempt fate by saying 'Oh I smashed that paper' or 'Of course I passed'. Ive learn t the hard way that you can never be certain of anything in life and that something that may seen certain will end up completely messed up. So I am always worrying about whether I passed or failed, yes I know im torturing myself and causing my white hair, but that just me. I always leave room for the disappointment of failure so if it ever happens ill be ready and not be struck down from a lofty pedestal only to find out that falling does hurt. Shukr I've never failed but still its like a defence mechanism...no I will not psycho analyze myself.
So as with the ending of most crappy movies or a Scooby Doo cartoon (God I hated those) I retraced my steps at campus and formulated a mental montage. A montage of everything I experienced and learnt from campus and you know what...I had a blast. It has taken me 2 degrees to get this point in my life but im glad I took the journey. I set out from campus to do medicine but unfortunately that was not written for me. Failure to get into medicine opened other doors for me and its turned out to be the best for me. I have met so many wonderful people and learnt so many things that Ive realized that the courses you do at varsity is not what makes one intelligent, its how one uses that knowledge and what one learns from life's experiences.
So Ive been waiting for my marks since the 5th of November with the usual dread and anxiety. Of course it hasnt been a constant thought in my mind, but when my mind is still the thought of my results and the possibility of a horror story floodsback into my mind. Now I do apologise to all my friends who I have whined to and at the end of the day you were all right.....I am a worry wart and had nothing to worry about. My marks finally came out yesterday and I PASSED (WOOOOHOOOO.........AAAAAAAAAH.......does a funny dance)
However this not the end of the road for my studies. Life is one big course littered with exams which are structured in different ways...some easy some incredibily difficult. We learn lessons and are tested at every moment of our life from sunrise to sunset and it only ends when we eventually walk down the tunnel of light. Until that day ill be a student of Life
Kuwabara, Kuwabara
The Lobe Writer
10 comments:
Awesome stuff k man :D. I'm proud of you. Now you can finally get down to serious matters- like finishing fallout.
Another pat on the back son. You deserve it.
I'm curious- why have you started publishing under your own name now?
The word verificationfor my first comment says demon. For some reason it gives me proper words most of time. Last one i saw said trotters.
Word verification for this comment is cowpee. I couldn't make this up if i tried
I have some um experience in failure so I can relate to your anxiety. Congrats! And I so loved Scooby Doo, what did he ever do to u?
congrats
the email signature of our psychologist who specialises in psychometrics is "Life is a Test". so yeah. its just beginning :)
MJ : Thanks man. And you right i can now finish bioshock and fallout lol. I started publishing under my real name as i decided i have nothing to hide and most of my readers already knew who i was. The K man is still alive though :)
Work in Progress: Failure is only a stepping stone to success. Thanks for the congratulations. Its not that Scooby did anything to me its that every episode was the same so thats probably why i disliked it :)
Thanks nooj :) Life is surely a test i just hope i get a couple of easier tests before the really hard ones begin :)
:-) Reading your post really made me smile! Congratulations! I never doubted that you'd ace your exams! I also dont think it could have happened to a nicer guy- your tops Karoles! :-D We owe you a celebratory milkshake. Life is indeed a journey and those tests never end but there is sweetness in the success of those tests- so faith in lots more goodness to come your way inshaAllah!
(Now we're on a mission to find you a wife-heheheh)- see you later!
congrats!
i knew you'd passed... :)
On your point of "LIFE begins" - the uncertainty is the worst part of it at this moment; but I think that's totally natural.
The day I got my final varsity results, everyone seemed to think I should be so happy to have passed. And although I did feel some relief at that, I was more overtaken by anxiety about what came next in my life.
Until we grow up and finish our studies, the course of our lives is generally a well-known path: 12 years of school, then however many years of varsity.
Each year it's a new progression - new subjects, material, etc - but always, it's within the safe confines of knowing what comes next.
Once you graduate - unless you're already accepted into a job or internship (and even in those cases) - that safety net is gone. you don't know what comes next. You don't know if you're going to find a job at all, let alone one in which you'll do what you studied. And, what if what you studied doesn't translate into what you actually enjoy doing in a career?
From what you wrote here though, I reckon you'll cope fine with whatever comes your way - because you have the right perspective of the challenges we face in life.
May your future be bright, and may you make great contributions to this world, insha-Allah
Congrats :D You're 100% right...what we learn in theory mean snothing if we can't use it..so go out there and show them what you've got :)
Best of luck!!
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