Homo sapiens ignoramus

Ladies and Gentleman, boys and girls of all ages I have successfully found a previously unknown branch of Humans, the "weak" link in human evolution, Homo sapiens ignoramus (H.ignoramus). They walk amongst us unknown and unaware that they are in fact different, "special" because they are in fact ignorant!

I think I was always aware of there presence from a young age but my first encounter with H.ignoramus must have been in high school with the subclass H.ignoramus indianus africanus (the ignorant South African Indian). My suspicions were only further reinforced when I came to Wits (The University of Witwatersrand) and I observed the subclass in all its glorious stupidity.

Now a scientific analyses of their anatomy is not required here, but what is required is a few defining features of H.ignoramus indianus africanus. The preliminary data has shown that this Indian subclass seemed to act as normal as possible but their love for ignorance shone through. They valued ignorance over knowledge and looked down upon those of us (H.sapiens) who spoke properly without vulgarity and slang, and those who had some semblance of knowledge and intellect. H.ignoramus indianus africanus had a distinct affinity for procrastination and never attempted to better themselves by going for lectures or God forbid the library, which was seen as a place of weakness like kryptonite is for Superman, and was only used at the last minute before exams or to escape the cold. They congregated on “The Steps” (a possible symbolic place for them) playing cards from 8am till 5pm unaware that their inability to think in a mature and moral way is costing thousands of Rands every year. One card game in particular called “thunnie” (forgive my spelling for this word is not known to me) were viciously contested and often ended in conflict between the players. H.ignoramus indianus africanus also seemed to try and out do each others ignorance and the most ignorant were celebrated as if they were warriors returning from the battlefield whereas the so called “geeks’ were cast aside, (they probably have a hierarchy where the most ignorant rule, that my explain our politicians).

As far as their appearance goes it is very similar to ours, in fact you cannot tell us apart. They place a lot of importance on the Brand names on their clothes, so much so that wearing something that isn’t branded is frowned upon. The males (and some females) use this gel like substance to style their hair into weird and wonderful shapes, probably in order to attract the opposite sex, or maybe it’s an adornment that they can’t live without. Some of the females in their dressing leave nothing to the imagination however they cover there hair, the reason for this I have yet to ascertain, why cover your hair when your entire body is exposed? I have a theory that they are either blending in with us, or we are following them, which would mean that their ignorance may be contagious and that we may be heading for dark times, very dark times.

Even thou they place so much emphasis on being ignorant there is only one thing more valuable to H.ignoramus indianus africanus, and that is money. Money is partly where their ignorance stems from, because most are rich, spoilt and completely rely on there fathers money. So they feel that there is no reason for them to make there own money because that would mean actually learning and why do that when they already have money, they are under the false assumption that it will never run out. There lives are driven by money, the males fathers buy them expensive clothes and cars and the Females look at these aspects when attempting to acquire a male. I fear that H.ignoramus indianus africanus will breed and become the majority, though I fear this may already have occurred. I will continue my observations in order to ascertain if they are a threat, but in the interim time please be careful of these people because it is folly to be wise in the land of the fools.

Kuwabara, Kuwabara
The Lone Writer