Words of Wisdom....

Abu Hurairah Radhi Allahu Anhu narrates that Nabi Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam said : "A man is on the religion of his friend. Therefore, be careful who you befriend." (Tirmidhi, Abu Dawood)

Commentary :

Companionship and environment have an effect upon a person. A person who remains in an itr shop for a while will come out with a sweet smell emitting from his body and clothes. Similarly a person sitting close to fire will be affected with the smoke. Similarly, friends encourage each other towards a similar path. Good company encourages one to do good and evil company encourages evil. It is advisable to be in the company of the pious so that one is encouraged towards good actions

A very good friend of mine sent this to me in an email and I think is a fundamental truth. Its been on my mind for awhile now so I thought I would share it with the rest of you. Its akin to the English saying "Birds of a feather flock together" but I think its more powerful especially with the commentary. A person is judged by the friends they keep, no matter how different you may be from your friends, if they do something that is seen as unbecoming then that stigma is placed on you. It doesn't matter whether its a rumor, people always will use the adage "Where there is smoke there is fire" and always think the worse. Its harsh but one has to be careful with the company one keeps and should know exactly who are friends and who are the "users".

I feel this can be used or adapted to include the person who you choose to spend the rest of your life with. Love only takes you so far, you have to choose a person who will not just give up at the first sign of trouble, someone who will stick through the tough times and someone who will help you grow and reach your full potential. Of course love is important but what about compatibility. (yes r I'm leaning towards compatibility) Someone that will learn to love your little idiosyncrasy's that are not apparent at first. Now this is turning into a tangent, and deserves a blog post on its own.

Maktub
The Lone Writer

My Big Fat Greek Birthday.

As you all know or maybe you dont but I turned 23 on Saturday and it was great. So this is the mandatory post birthday blog where I tell you what I did and what not.... oh Capital! I can see the excitment on your faces now accompanied by a small trickle of drool down the left side of your mouth as the first snore resonates of the walls of your current domicile. So lets get this show on the road.

I've never placed great significance on a birthday, I mean its merely another day closer to the end. So I hardly make a fuss about my birthday but its nice to know that people do care enough to let you know that they are thinking of you even if its just for that day or due to a forgotten reminder on their phones, and for me the thought behind it is what counts, not the gifts. Needless to say I did get chocolates and Im awaiting another gift from someone who shall not be mentioned :) but is like the sweetest ever :)

So I got a phone call before midnight (super sweet thanks A.L for being the first well wisher) and the messages by people trying to be the first to wish me happy birthday which always makes one feel extremely special. I even got well wishes on my chat box... how awesome is that.... :) Thanks guys. I dont have like hordes of friends but the friends I have are my friends for life and I would not swop them for all the gold in fort knox. So I needed a laugh so went to see MR BEAN lol.... Yes i know same old same old but its like nostalgic funny so I enjoyed that. Then one of the two highlights of my night was the Jhb Blog meeting, even though not everyone was present and apparently me bringing non bloggers along was abit of an issue (dont ask me I have no idea way) it was awesome. I could only stay for about and hour due to a previous engagement but I got to meet Fatima (The Sweet), Ruby (RUBY RUBY RUBY!) and BiBi-aisha (the RED) for the first time which was amazing so thanks alot ladies it was a pleasure. Whilst I was there I also got a speak to the one the only my greatest fan boy MJ!!!! Thanks man was really cool and you better come to Jhb.

So then the greek part of my evening started. I was wisked away to sandton to have supper at pappas (a greek resturant) with my friends and Bibi Aisha who decided to crash my party :p (you more than welcome to crash the next one). The food was ok, usually its brilliant but as usual the entertainment was awesome. They have a belly dancer (and this time she had these torches of fire) and this like traditional greek dancing and they encourage patron participation so it has a great atmosphere. I skipped dancing with the belly dancer (I had enough of that in egypt) so very uncharacteristically since it was my birthday I joined in the greek dancing! No skill was involved it was basically moving around in a circle arms on shoulders and doing a version of the can-can but it was so much fun, still cant believe I did It but I guess you surprise yourself everyday.

And that was it! pretty normal but I spent it with new friends from the blogosphere and old friends and that was the main thing and I wouldnt change it for anything. So thanks To the bloggers who i met and who wished me well on my blog (If im in Durbs I will definately check you guys out... I promise I dont bite anymore) and to my friends, you made my night a Special one.

Now im going to cry ..................BOOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOO hehehehehehehe NOT!!!

WHUUUPA!
The Lone Writer

Hello darkness, my old friend

Im listening to Simon and Garfunkels "The Sound of Silence" hence the title of this post. Can’t remember when I downloaded it but I am glad I did considering not many people these days even know who they are let alone that they were musicians. It's a really cool song with great lyrics but has absolutely nothing to do with Im about to write and the title doesn’t either. Just thought it had a nice ring to it don’t you think?

Campus starts again for yet another year on the 12th of Feb. So another year of similar trials, tribulations, more white hair and hopefully some new experiences. Well one new experience ill be undergoing is attempting to make a whole lot of new friends. Now im not anti social or a guy who lurks in the shadows and calls himself by a super hero alias, im as friendly as the next guy though a tad bit shy but that’s another kettle of fish.

Making friends is a skill that you first get introduced to in nursery or preschool. Your parents leave you in an unfamiliar place, you surrounded by kids crying their eyes out and small furniture and you expected to make friends with no previous experience and you do somehow. The exact method is variable and I doubt anyone has perfected it because there is so much to take into consideration when attempting to become someone’s friend.

Now fast forward and the method to make friends is still elusive. I have a lot of friends who I met on campus but I have no idea how I got to know them or when did we become such good friends. The transition from strangers to friends was a complete blur, or has been erased from my mind and since we don’t live in the movies I doubt that’s a possibility. I made these friends and then didn’t feel the need to make new friends since i was so comfortable with them. Now for the first time on campus my friends are all finished and im alone on campus. No crew no nothing. So now the task of making friends.

We never really escape that first day in preschool, all nervous and impressionable without a clue as to what we should or shouldn’t be doing and I feel like im right back there. I’m not a loner I do have acquaintances on campus but not friends. Ok so you meet someone greet and smile so it shows you are friendly hmmm but what if they think you being funny or pretentious. So you keep more of a straight face and try to be as truthful as possible without seeming like you are a bleeding heart and suffer from verbal diarrhea. Then you chat about random stuff such as the weather or some similarly obvious topic and always seem to be stating the bleeding obvious, but you know you cant chat about that stuff forever so then you try to bring in something you both have in common be it work, a mutual friend, movies or music (voice in head says "don’t bring up star wars please don’t") etc. However this may end up being boring and the person may think you are a bore of note if your tastes don’t exactly correspond so you turn on the humor. Now the choice is to go with subtle humor, slapstick, making fun of yourself or go with some risqué humor. Any humor should work right? I mean people like it when you funny? No not really you may over do it and they may think that you a complete clown that cant say anything without laughing like a donkey, so then to show you not a fool you start talking about something serious, maybe world news or the state of affairs in the country. Now don’t get carried away just relax. The conversation ends and most of the time you have no idea what you have just said. Got to be an easier way. Ok the above is a slight exaggeration or maybe it isn’t who knows.

Now you can talk yourself blue in the face and be the friendliest person on the planet but if that person or persons won’t let you into their circle of friendship you have no hope. The first impression lasts pops into mind. Now if you trying to impress someone are you really yourself? The first time you meet someone you are generally nervous or cautious at what you say so how can someone judge you? Make a good impression I understand but what if it takes a false impression for it to be a good one? Even if you pull it off can you maintain it? Can you live a lie? Ok this is abit dramatic I know.

Friendship is like any relationship both parties have to work on it. Compromises, respect, and what not. Friendship is not a competition I don’t want to be impressed by my friend or be in awe of his achievements, we should be equal and should not need to compete. Its not hard to make friends but to make the right friends takes abit of searching. The key is being yourself and not changing for anyone or for anything. You will eventually find people like minded and similar to yourself. Your friends should like you for who you are not what you are. So im just going to be myself, plain old K-man, and if I bring up Chewbacca in a conversation so be it that’s me. So my search for new friends to supplement my old ones begins wish me luck!

Kuwabara, Kuwabara
The Lone Writer